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Nonconsensual relationships
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Originally Published: February 16, 2007
~ Last Updated / Reviewed on: February 13, 2009
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Most Recent
(1) Dear Reader, I am 26 now. Between the ages of 15 and 17, I was repeatedly raped and mentally, physically and emotionally abused by my acting/vocal coach at the time. I experienced the symptoms your girlfriend is experiencing, plus anxiety attacks and depression. After I met the man who is now my husband, I had the courage to go to therapy. I needed his understanding, patience and support, and he gave it to me. Going through therapy was the hardest thing I ever had to do. My therapist had me re-live every bad thing that happened to me in total detail. She recorded the sessions, and I had to listen to them every day. I also had to realize the things that would trigger my emotional upsets and immerse myself in them until they no longer affected me. I watched movies with rape scenes and read books about people who had been abused as well. After four months of this, I stopped getting nightmares and anxiety. It has been two years since I saw the therapist, and I am a better/healthier person because of it. I hope my input helps you help her.
[back to top] Being there for your partner is something courageous and great that will be appreciated down the way. I was in an abusive relationship for 6 years. Counseling does tremendous things for a special person who has been broken. Encourage your friend to seek a professional with whom she is comfortable with. Maybe find yourself a counselor to help you learn more, even if it does end up in just friendship. Hopefully in time your partner will realize she can heal and with help she can realize how wonderful she can be.
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