Dear Reader,

I think your boyfriend is totally wrong in forcing you into doing it (emotionally). YOU did nothing wrong and must not feel as if you did. Your boyfriend used the fact that you love him to convince himself he was right in what he did. Go and see a doctor to make sure everything is ok and then dump your boyfriend. Can you talk to a teacher that you trust? If not, talk to your parents or close sibling. But you must not blame yourself for any of this.

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(2)

Alice,

"Was I raped?" Why is the question phrased that way to begin with? For me the only time that this comes up as a question involves an unusual experience with some older college students and a conviction that I was certainly drugged and set up more than a decade ago. Was I raped? Probably. Do I remember it? No. Do I remember finding the evidence that something awful took place? Yes. Mostly on my body. I was later in life honest to God, no two ways about it raped outright in my own home (while I was there to be a part of it every step of the way). That time we played the police game! I am not denying the high emotional stakes for this young lady and her partner, in fact I would like them to be acknowleged. But I find it outrageous and insulting to assume that any case of sexual contact that leaves the woman unsure or ill at ease is probably a case of rape. Rape is one of the most violent and degrading acts that can be forced onto someone else. There really is nothing else like it. I hope that I can communicte this to as many people as possible. I cannot begin to express my contempt for people who blithely utter the phrase, "It was as if I were raped" to score a point. I go beyond contempt and into out-right nausea when educted women are encouraged to think of themselves as "victims/survivors" of RAPE!!! at the drop of a hat.

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(3)
Alice,

This is in response to the reader of "Was I raped?"

Yes I believe that you were raped! No guy ever has the right to do that to you! Honey you need to find someone to talk to because if you told him to stop he should of stopped. I would find a new boyfriend if i were you. Good luck hun!

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(4)

Alice!

The exact same thing happened to me. It was over a year ago and I only now just began to deal with it. If I were back in this position, where you are now, I would see a counselor right away. Make sure she understands exactly what you are saying, so that she can help you. Otherwise, it will haunt you forever.

Take it from me.

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(5)

Dear Reader,

Yes, you were raped. Rape is often considered on two levels — personal and legal.

Personally, you did not want him to enter you, and you made that abundantly clear to him. You not only said no, but you said no repeatedly — your answer was clear, and rape is not defined by who wins in a physical fight, but whether one partner violates the other's rights and expressed wishes concerning sex.

Legally, you were certainly raped. Courts have upheld case after case of women merely saying no one time, let alone many. You do not have to physically resist; no means no, and violating that is a crime.

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(6)
Hon,

If you felt violated, you were raped. I know it's hard to tell someone you love to stop. I'm sorry that you've experienced this, but please seek some sort of counseling because this may affect you in the future.

If he doesn't know that no means no, you need to stop seeing this guy, and you need to look inside yourself as to what you want. May peace be with you.

— Chastity