Dear Reader,

It's a common misperception that sex between women is without risk. In fact, there are even still health care providers out there with misinformation and a lack of knowledge in this area. While sexually transmitted infections (STIs), especially HIV, are generally less common among women who sleep exclusively with women than their heterosexual and bisexual counterparts, safer sex is still adviseable. The reality is that sexual health risks have little to do with who you are or who you are sexually attracted to, and lots to do with whether your partner(s) have any infections.

Safer sex between two women involves many of the same strategies as for any set of partners, and the ideas below can be part of sex without ruining the mood. The causes of most concern are bodily fluids, including menstrual blood, vaginal juices, breast milk, and secretions from STI sores. Here are some safer sex tips:

• During oral sex, cover the entire vaginal or anal area with a dam (a square of latex), non-microwaveable plastic wrap, or a cut-open condom or latex glove. Use creative means of keeping the latex or wrap in place, such as a garter belt, to leave your hands free to roam. During vulva-to-vulva sex, a similar latex barrier can be placed over the vaginal area.
• Manual penetration of the vagina and anus can be risky if a partner's fingers or hand have sores or open cuts. If you're concerned about this, use latex gloves, condoms, or finger cots. Always use new "materials" when moving from the anus to the vagina, or between partners.
• If you use sex toys, wash them in hot, soapy water or with a bleach solution before sharing, or use fresh condoms on them for each partner.
• Generally, S&M practices are safe, unless blood or bodily fluids are involved (and they're consensual, of course!). For example, clean any piercing needles with bleach before using them on someone else.
• If you shave one another, use a separate razor for each partner.
• If either woman suspects that she might have an STI, it's important that she be tested and sex avoided until both partners have been tested and (if necessary) treated. Some partners like to get tested together before ever having sex, just in case. This can help to ease your minds and may even increase your sense of connectedness, too.

Remember that several STIs — for example, herpes and Human Papillomavirus (HPV) — are transmitted through skin-to-skin contact. You can put a latex barrier over the area affected, and/or refrain from sexual activity when the virus is active: right before a flare-up and while sores are present. For more detailed information, see Herpes info for lesbians and Genital warts.

It can often be helpful, too, to think broadly about safer sex between women. Yeast and infections such as bacterial vaginosis can be transmitted between women, and you can use the pointers above to prevent this. Also, rimming, or oral pleasuring of the anus, brings risks of hepatitis A and gastrointestinal problems. In this case, you can use dams or a condom slipped over your tongue to protect you and your lover.

Since you and your partner have enjoyed reading poems and stories together, why not sit down for some more reading pleasure? There's lots of information and suggestions around, whether in books, videos, or by the soft light of the computer screen. Check these out:

• LesbianSTD.com
• Our Bodies, Ourselves, by the Boston Women's Health Book Collective
• The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us, by Felice Newman
• National STD Hotline: 1.800.CDC.INFO

Now that you're informed, stock up on the supplies of your choice and enjoy!

Alice

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