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Relating and communicating
Originally Published: October 13, 2000 ~ Last Updated / Reviewed on: September 14, 2007
 
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(1)
Dear Alice,

RE: BOYFRIEND SITS DOWN WHEN HE URINATES

I had to respond to the question about the guy who sat down to pee. I do as well, as do some of my other male friends.

Part of it is, as you surmised, an attempt to take care of both #1 and #2 in one visit. Part of it is habit due to years of bathroom reading while growing up. But that's not just it (at least not for me). I'm anti-urinal. I never stand when there is a stall available. Urinals stink, there's no privacy, and you do have to worry about splash-back.

Plus, there's no toilet paper. It's always embarrassing to pee standing up, finish your business, zip up, and find out there was a little dribble left, which now has created a damp spot on the front of your trousers. That NEVER happens while sitting.

I don't know if this makes me odd, or strange, but if it does, so what? If you've taught me anything over the years, Alice, it's that it's better to be the man you are than to worry about what's "normal." So sign me:

Sitting on the Throne

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(2)
Dear Alice,

I have to respond to this as a mom of two boys. Men and boys are not exactly good at aiming when standing. Plus, there is always splash back, which mom must clean. I make my boys sit when peeing; it's less mess for me. But, when in public, they do stand, to fit in with the norm.

California

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(3)
Dear Alice,

I decided to sit while urinating after working as the janitor in a men's dorm at a university. The mess associated with urinals and toilets was amazing. I realized that I wanted to clean bathrooms less often and sitting would reduce the need to clean.

Disgusted at Work

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(4)
Dear Alice,

I am a male who does the same thing. The reason is I take medication that makes it hard to pee. Standing up could take as long as 2 - 5 minutes. When I sit down, for some reason I relax and it becomes easier and normal. When I'm not on this medication, the problem goes away.

Seat Down

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(5)
Dear Alice,

I am replying to: BOYFRIEND SITS DOWN WHEN HE URINATES.

I am in college and many, many friends of mine who have traveled say that in Europe (England mostly), there are stickers/signs in restrooms everywhere showing a man peeing upright, with a red circle and line through it (discouraging it). My friends took one of these home and put it on their toilet for humour. But, I have been told sitting urination for guys is the norm in MANY places, I'm assuming especially in public places.

Minnesota

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(6)
Alice

I sit down to pee only at home, as no matter how good of an aim you may think you have, you will still splash and someone (and maybe it's you) may have to clean it up, and that is nasty. It's a common courtesy to the person to whom that chore has been assigned in your home. When I'm in a public place, I use the urinal as it is cleaner for me; however, if there is only a toilet; I at least lift the seat. Again common courtesy; I'm not going to sit on it as bubba and dip shit have already pissed on it, but I'm not going to make it any worse. Common courtesy; if you don't have it, get it.

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(7)
There is one other possible explanation for this gentleman's preference. There is a condition called Paruresis (or Bashful Bladder syndrome) and it is a form of anxiety that can range from moderate to extreme. I recommend going to http://www.paruresis.org/ for more info.

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(8)
I started to mostly sit down to urinate maybe ten years years ago (I'm 43) simply to avoid the mess and clean-up of splashing. If you've ever seen the dividers in a mens room rusting-out (and stinking...), that's what eventually convinced me I was making a gross mess in my own home that you don't see so much each time, but it accumulates. Get down and look at the sides of any bowl men have used and you'll probably notice yellow streaks and puddles around the bolts. Gross! My current girlfriend (who has 20-somethings son and a daughter), mentioned 'the men option' early in our relationship, and she finds it inconsiderate of men to make a mess (for usually others to clean up), when it's alleviated by simply sitting down.

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