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Relating and communicating
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Originally Published: December 16, 1994
~ Last Updated / Reviewed on: October 02, 2009
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Alice, I am very much in love with my girlfriend. She would like to come live with me next summer (between semesters), but I have a cat and she is allergic. I was thinking that if I kept the house well vacuumed, and bought an air filter, gave the cat baths, or something, it might help. Do you have any suggestions? I love them both, neither more than the other, but I don't know what to do. Thanks. —Friend of Cat
Dear Friend of Cat, Your intentions are all for the right things. Namely:
Allergies to household pets are quite common. Those allergic to cats and dogs often experience swelling and itching of the membranes, like a congested itchy noses and inflamed, watery eyes. The best treatment for allergies is to remove the allergen, which is in this case the cats, but if that is not something you want to do there are other steps you can take. Some allergy prevention steps you can take are:
If these methods don't help enough to keep your girlfriend's eyes dry and nose un-dripping, she can try taking over-the-counter or prescription allergy medicine. Antihistamines and topical nasal steroids tend to be very effective, though decongestant nose drops and sprays should not be used for more than a few days. If these treatments are ineffective, your girlfriend can also try immunotherapy, or allergy shots, that reduce allergy symptoms over a longer period of time. However if you are only living together for the summer, this might take a longer time to work than you have together. If your girlfriend and your cats are both stable and continuous elements in your life, this might be a great long-term solution. You could also try calling your veterinarian and see if s/he has additional suggestions for dealing with pet allergies. If medicines are ineffective or un-desirable, it might be necessary to consider prioritizing either your girlfriend or your cat. Perhaps you could find friends who would be happy to have your cat stay with them for the summer? Or your girlfriend could rent her own place and you could spend time with her there? Relationships are always full of compromises, and the ability to find creative solutions that work for everyone is one of the many skills individuals in long-term relationships learn well.
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